In the grand theatre of life, personalities unfurl like the diverse acts of a play, each character unique in their own way. Insecurity, a subtle enemy, often dons disguises that masquerade as more familiar traits, leading us astray in our judgment. Many mistake its symptoms for those of anxiety, nervousness, or shyness. However, beneath the surface, the roots of insecurity manifest in ways both unexpected and intriguing.

Did you ever imagine that arrogance, dominance, or quick temperaments could also be indicators of insecurity? As we delve into these paradoxical qualities, we’ll unveil the enigma of insecurity, the fear of losing one’s footing at its core.

Proverbs 29:25 – The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is safe.

The Paradox of Personality Traits #

It’s fascinating to contemplate the similarities between seemingly opposing personality qualities and behaviours. Within the realm of leadership, four pairs of opposing traits surprisingly converge, all pointing to a shared root: a lack of confidence.

But how can we discern when a pastor, a boss, or any authority figure is concealing their insecurities behind a façade of strength? Let’s embark on a journey of discovery.

1. The Unending Competition: When Confidence Wanes #

A telltale sign of an insecure leader is their perpetual competition with other churches or organizations.

When leadership lacks self-assuredness, it can lead to an unhealthy sense of rivalry. These leaders are quick to highlight the flaws of other churches and their leaders while underscoring their successes as evidence of superiority. It’s as if they’re saying, “We’re doing it right, and they’re doing it wrong.” Their insecurities fuel the fear of other churches encroaching on their territory, depleting their resources, or stealing their congregants. It’s a comparison that stems from their own insecurities, comparing their struggles and disappointments with the perceived triumphs of others.

Both boastful pride and resentful jealousy share the same fatal flaw: they view other churches and their leaders as competitors vying for market share, rather than partners united in advancing God’s kingdom. True leaders, grounded in the gospel, understand that there is no competition among brethren in Christ. The success of one church is a triumph for all.

2. Undermining Authority: A Symptom of Insecurity #

Another manifestation of insecurity is undermining the authority of those under them within the association.

Mark 9:35 – And he sat down and called the twelve. And he said to them, “If anyone would be first, he must be last of all and servant of all.”

I recall a church I heard about a few years back, where the youth pastor changed every year, the young adult pastor shifted every few years, and teaching pastors rotated continually. This pattern was a direct result of the lead pastor’s insecurities. If he noticed that another leader or ministry was gaining popularity, he would eliminate them, safeguarding his position and the weekend service’s prominence. Such a display of authoritarianism was driven by deep-seated fear.

Moreover, leaders who constantly fret about their impact or the growth of their colleagues display two distinct dysfunctions. When a leader is continuously critical, dismissive, or even sarcastic, it’s a manifestation of insecurity. They may perceive their subordinates’ influence as a threat to their position within the organization and seek ways to diminish their stature.

However, this isn’t limited to overt criticism; it also manifests as passive paranoia. Confident leaders aren’t threatened by the power or respect garnered by their peers or associates. They recognize that success for one is success for all. Anchored in the gospel, they’re not intimidated by the talents, accomplishments, or accolades of fellow leaders.

3. Micromanagement and Passivity: Two Sides of Insecurity #

Micromanagement and passivity may seem worlds apart, but both are hallmarks of insecure leadership. How can this be?

Micromanagement, on the one hand, signifies a leader’s lack of trust in their team’s ability to perform tasks independently. Curiously, it’s also a sign of doubt in their capability to assemble and guide a competent team. When you don’t trust your team’s potential, it’s because you don’t trust your judgment in selecting and directing them.

Proverbs 3:5-6 – Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.

Passivity, on the other hand, is born of insecurity as well. It stems from a leader’s fear of relinquishing control or relinquishing the limelight, fearing that it might diminish their influence or prestige.

Matthew 22:39 – You shall love your neighbour as yourself.

Authentic leadership involves mentoring, guiding, and providing support to those under your charge. Leaders who shy away from these responsibilities become ineffective and cannot truly call themselves leaders.

A leader who fails to take initiative is, at best, a leader in name only or, at worst, an empty title. Leadership involves active engagement, seeking input, collaborating on projects, and sharing leadership responsibilities. When leaders fail to include their subordinates, seek their opinions, initiate projects together, and distribute leadership responsibilities, they hide behind their titles, becoming ineffectual figureheads. This reveals a lack of confidence in their team and a reluctance to delegate power out of fear of losing control or prestige.

Ephesians 4:11-12 – And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ.

4. Self-Obsession: Two Sides of the Same Coin #

Another remarkable paradox lies in the realm of self-obsession. On one end, some leaders are consumed by their own greatness, perpetually living in the third person. On the opposite end, others drown in self-pity, incessantly focusing on their troubles and insecurities.

Philippians 2:3-4 – Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests but also to the interests of others.

These two extremes, though different in behaviour, stem from the same source: insecurity. It’s fascinating how both forms of self-centeredness betray a profound sense of insecurity.

Have you ever been in a small group or Sunday school class with that one person who consistently overshadows the conversation with their own achievements, experiences, or accolades?

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They can’t help but make everything about themselves. This self-reverential behaviour is just as conceited as the arrogant individual trying to seize the spotlight. Both extremes signal an obvious insecurity.

The Path to Overcoming Insecurity: Grounded in the Gospel #

So, what is the antidote to these manifestations of insecurity in leadership?

It begins with a redefinition of ourselves in light of Christ. The insecurities that manifest as aggression, passivity, arrogance, or self-pity can only be conquered by finding security in the gospel.

Romans 12:3 – For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.

Jesus’ example of servant leadership serves as the remedy for apprehensive leadership. The assurance found in Christ’s gospel, where sinners are freely justified, united with Christ to sit with Him in heavenly places, and empowered by the Holy Spirit to obey God and bear godly fruit, dispels insecurity.

2 Corinthians 12:9 – But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

The manifestations of insecurity in leadership are both intriguing and paradoxical. Recognizing these signs and understanding their underlying cause is the first step towards healing and growth as leaders.

Leaders Grounded in the Gospel #

Leaders who anchor themselves in the gospel are secure in their identities in Christ, and they understand that leadership is not about competition, control, or self-obsession. Instead, it’s about humility, servanthood, and empowerment. Insecure leaders can find true confidence in the knowledge that their worth is rooted in Christ, not in the approval or recognition of others.

Galatians 2:20 – I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

By embracing gospel-centred leadership, we can overcome the insecurities that hinder our effectiveness and lead with grace, humility, and love, building up the body of Christ and advancing His kingdom.

Ephesians 4:15-16 – Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.

Leaders who are grounded in Christ become instruments of unity and growth within the body of Christ. They don’t see their fellow leaders as rivals but as partners on the same journey. The success of one church or ministry becomes a cause for celebration rather than envy.

Romans 15:5-6 – May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another, in accord with Christ Jesus, that together you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Philippians 2:1-4 – So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests but also to the interests of others.

Additionally, these gospel-centered leaders do not undermine the authority or influence of those under their care. Instead, they empower and equip their team members, recognizing that a leader’s success is intertwined with the success of their team.

1 Thessalonians 5:11 – Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.

Hebrews 10:24 – And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works.

Insecure leaders often find themselves trapped in a cycle of micromanagement or passivity, fearing the loss of control or recognition. However, leaders who trust in the gospel can confidently delegate responsibilities, knowing that their worth is not contingent on maintaining a tight grip on power.

Proverbs 11:14 – Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counsellors there is safety.

Matthew 25:21 – His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’

Moreover, leaders grounded in Christ are neither self-absorbed nor self-pitying. They recognize their identity in Christ and find their significance in serving others with humility and grace.

Colossians 3:23-24 – Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.

Philippians 4:13 – I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

The Transformative Journey #

The journey towards overcoming insecurity in leadership begins with a deep understanding and embrace of the gospel. Insecure leaders often grapple with pride, rivalry, control issues, and self-centeredness, all of which hinder their effectiveness. These are deep-underlying issues of the heart. But through the transformative power of the gospel, leaders can find security, humility, and purpose in their roles.

2 Corinthians 3:5 – Not that we are sufficient in ourselves to claim anything as coming from us, but our sufficiency is from God.

As leaders embrace gospel-centered leadership, they become instruments of unity, growth, and love within the body of Christ. Their leadership becomes a source of encouragement, empowerment, and inspiration, reflecting the love and grace of Christ to those they serve.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 – Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Ultimately, gospel-centered leaders lead not for their own glory but for the glory of God, seeking to build up His kingdom and advance His purposes. It is through this transformative journey that leaders can truly overcome insecurity and become effective instruments of God’s grace in the world.

Isaiah 41:10 – Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

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In your quest to become a gospel-centred leader, remember that growth is a process. It involves introspection, self-awareness, and a willingness to continuously align your leadership with the principles of Christ’s gospel. Embrace humility, seek the counsel of wise mentors and peers, and prioritize the well-being and growth of your team members.

Proverbs 27:17 – Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.

James 3:17 – But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.

As you lead with the gospel of Jesus Christ as your compass, you’ll discover that insecurity loses its grip, replaced by a profound sense of purpose and confidence rooted in your identity in Christ. Your leadership will become a testament to the transformative power of the gospel, not only within your organization or church but also in the lives of those you serve.

1 Peter 5:6-7 – Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

1 Corinthians 16:14 – Let all that you do be done in love.

Remember that leadership is not about the spotlight but about shining the light of Christ. In the grand tapestry of God’s kingdom, each leader plays a unique role, and together, we advance His purposes with grace, love, and unwavering confidence in the gospel.

Shining the Light of Christ #

Matthew 5:16 – In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.

May your leadership journey be marked by humility, servanthood, and a deep, abiding trust in the gospel of Jesus Christ. Through His strength and grace, you can overcome insecurity and lead with purpose, making a lasting impact on those you serve and bringing glory to the One who called you to lead.

Ephesians 3:20-21 – Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.

Philippians 1:6 – And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.

Embrace the journey of gospel-centred leadership, and may your leadership shine as a beacon of hope and love in a world hungry for the transformative power of Christ’s gospel.

Blessings,

Shaliach.